Tea: PREMED IS A PAIN. Please make do with a Cat while I wait for this holiday weekend….
DNE: Hi, same disclosure as usual; speed translation and what not.
Me and My Beloved Cat (Girlfriend)
Day 4 Part 6
Author Note: Thank you for your support, I’ll do my best. (summarized by 9)
「Kasumi, you should take a nap… when you aren’t feeling good, you should sleep a lot.」
Honestly, I know I should, but… I’m not tired.
After all, the reason I’m like this is Mina, but we are always sleeping together.
「But come on Mina, you don’t have to sleep too.」
「Well, I love Kasumi after all.」
As if it was only natural, she hugged my back again… Does she like it when I’m with her? That’s too good to be true; my thoughts quickly denied such an interpretation.
Of course, when she was a cat she loves taking her nap… so even though she 『loves』me, I’m sure that it’s different from my 『love』. If I were Mina… I wouldn’t sleep together; my heart would give out.
On the contrary, Mina is sleeping soundly while hugging me. As her faint breath reaches me, my heart starts throbbing, heedless of protest.
…Just as I thought, my feelings won’t be able to reach her. Rather, it’s something that must not reach her. Even though I understand this… faced with the truth, a thorn pierces my heart.
Unable to sleep and with nothing to do, I turned on my smart phone. and tried to search 『love』.
To want someone, to want to touch them, to be tied to them… according to this site, it was that kind of feeling… these muddled feelings that i have for Mina, they’re exactly the same. (i kinda googled it)
So this is what I wanted to do with Mina.
I want to touch Mina more, I want my heart to throb , I want a kiss not just 『to be together』but rather to express our『love』 for each other.
Yet as expected, “feelings towards the『 opposite sex』” is also written here. (9: your search engine sucks)
So for myself and Mina, this 『love』has nowhere to go.
To other people, my feelings are just a sign that I’ve lost my way. If… if Mina felt the same… It’s a scary thought. It’s a very fragile existence having to kiss everyday or be split apart forever, and if she were to shun me over my feelings… I won’t risk it.
In my thoughts, Mina is everywhere. If she were to disappear again… it hurts to even consider.
But, we have to kiss everyday, and warmth in such contact only serves to stir up these feelings more.
It’s painful; it hurts; it feels good. My racing heartbeat begins to inspire my imagination, and before I could do anything, it’s become unstoppable.
Rotating myself around I look at Mina’s body. Seeing her like this… cute. I love you. I want to kiss you. I want my heart to race.
An overwhelming urge rose up from somewhere… was it my instincts or just my lust? Regardless, they drive my face up to Mina’s.
It’s hot, and it feels as if I’m being filled up.
Relaxing feelings, pleasant feelings, corrupt feelings, ecstatic feelings… they all pour into me, and my mind can comprehend nothing else.
Even though it lasted but a moment, for my body, the effects still lingered.
My body lay on Mina’s. The fragrance of her smell, the softness of her skin, the warmth of her body… it stirs my heart, bringing pain… but also relief.
These opposing forces are mixing inside me without feeling out of place.
But my courage, roused by Mina’s sleep, had vanished in an instant.
Whirling around to avoid seeing her more.
What should I do? …I just kissed Mina.
We’ve done this before of course, but that was consensual, because we both wanted『to be together』.
The self-loathing I already felt began to rise. Why would I do that to Mina just for my own lust? Why do I have these feelings to begin with?
Even though Mina had endured it so that we might stay together, I had betrayed her feelings.
If this was how things were going to turn out, you should have stolen Mina from me right from the start, Nekomata-sama.
================Chapter 17 End===================
Author’s Note: Wait… isn’t day 4 quite long? (9: …….) (Tea:……..LOL)