Ogregirl Chapter 95
Blunt Type Ogre Girl’s Way to Live Streaming
Late at Night. Suddenly my eyes opened.
For some reason, my head feels really heavy.
Rin-chan is…..sleeping fine.
Unlike me where I was following orders of Rin-chan to just clear the dungeon runs, Rin-chan was also doing all the things like the streaming, mapping, and even the schedule management.
Though she might be skilled in using her head, Rin-chan is surely also tired.
Since it would feel bad If I were to wake her up, I went off the bed without making any noise, and then went towards the balcony.
Despite being a huge room, it would make you think the balcony was narrow but the balcony was still wide as I put both of my hands on the guardrail, overlooking the light of the sleepless town.
A cooling wind passes through.
I wanted to be hit by the wind of the night.
And then, I wanted to absent-mindedly look towards the skies.
Seeing the skies like this, makes me recall the past.
The far, far away….fading memory.
Before I met Rin-chan, a hollow memory.
My memory is…actually, it’s scattered around and lacks accuracy.
It was mostly recent that I have discovered that.
Was it since I fought against the Aria red wolf? Every time I talk with Rin-chan, I recall a memory I don’t remember.
And there are these particular hazy memories, it was when I was little and then around when I was 15 years old.
And among those, what I recently remembered was the one where I was little.
And that was a memory which you could say was my origin story.
It was a memory a bit before I met with Rin-chan until the time I finally became friends with Rin-chan for real.
The old me smiled a lot and was a kid brimming with curiosity.
If I said that, anyone would probably lean over their head not being able to believe in it.
Especially if it’s the people who had only seen me when I was 3-15 years old, then they absolutely won’t be able to believe in me.
Just a bit before, didn’t Touka-chan say that I have changed?
From Right Now, a bit before, and when I was small.
Even for me, for it to give out so much difference up until now, I think that I have changed as if I became a different person.
It might be obvious after so long but my body is different from others.
Something that was in the shape of a human. To the point that those words fit very well towards me, my body structure was inhuman.
My physical ability, reflexes and my sharp five senses too.
Since forever, I have been living while trying to hold it back.
Ever since, the first time I broke mother.
Since the past, I loved destroying things.
Tearing a toy apart forcefully or hitting them.
Crushing them with toy blocks, splitting them apart, staining my hand with blood.
During my infant period I already had that much power, and that gradually became a destructive impulse that bore its fangs to my surroundings.
And that was, during when I was still very young where you don’t know if you have awareness in your surroundings, I passed that time doing nothing but breaking everything.
Father and Mother were, they looked worried seeing me like that but, they didn’t get angry.
To the both of them, it’s their first child. It seems that they didn’t know to what extent 「a normal child」is.
My destructive acts had started involving electrical appliances when I was 2 years old but, fortunately it didn’t get outside of the house.
And also including that, I think the 2 of them stayed silent and watched over me.
And then, an accident happened.
That right, on that day where I was with my parents, the 3 of us went outside for a long time.
Going out together with my beloved parents, I was so happy, so joyful.
The hand that I was holding together with my mother, I unintentionally grasped it tightly.
pakya(breaking sfx) along with a sound of something breaking, a very raw and warm liquid bursts.
And that was really pretty red and a very warm liquid.
It didn’t take that much time for me to notice that it was the blood of the crushed hand of my mother that scattered.
My mother who was crouching from the pain, my father who was rushing to her, the sound of the ambulance, the tumult towards the sudden disaster left such an impression on me.
I’m afraid. Feeling like that, it was the first time I felt so ever since I was born.
My own power, it was something that will break my important ones….to that point where I noticed that my own strength had already gone over the limits of humankind.
For the first time at that time, how terrible and foolish it is to destroy things, while very young I absent-mindedly understood that.
Ever since that accident, I couldn’t destroy anything.
Since I didn’t know which was good to destroy or not.
Depending on the person, they have different important things.
While hazy, ever since I noticed that fact.
And more than anything, breaking your important ones is so terrifying and scary that I can’t help….but the young me thought of this.
「If I don’t touch anything then, I won’t be able to destroy it」these words.
If I were able to control my strength then, my thoughts wouldn’t have probably arrived at such an extreme thought.
However, I was not an adult enough to be able to control my strength.
Ever since then, I shut down my interest towards the world.
My brimming curiosity was lost.
Abandoned my desire.
As long as they don’t offer my meals and water, I won’t do anything.
Excluding only sleep, I abandoned my free will.
Seeing me like that, I didn’t know what father or mother thought of me.
However, the 2 of them poured love to me.
With a really sad face, to their daughter who has become a doll that won’t say anything, even so they continued to love.
However but still, because of my refusal, between me and my parents, skin contact was lost.
Because we mutually love each other, we gave birth to a twisted parent child relationship.
From birth to 2 years and a half.
That was, the time that passed until I became a doll, it was the period where I was the most human.
That squeezing small hand of hers, I remember its temperature felt really warm.
Back then Rin-chan who had no sense of athleticism still wanted to play outside, she was a child that frequently gets injured.
Even during the time where she plays at the playgrounds, and even during she plays a game with running in it, she gets injured so much that you could say that it always happens.
At the beginning I didn’t really think of anything about it but..
Whenever I saw Rin-chan getting injured on the sidelines, I came to think that I should save her.
and every time I do, the red color of when I broke mother comes into my mind and then my body wouldn’t be able to move.
Since I didn’t want to break Rin-chan, no matter what it is, I couldn’t just touch Rin-chan.
However, I wanted to save her to the point that my heart had moved.
To the point of not wanting to break her, I came to think of Rin-chan as something very important.
slowly and slowly.
In my frozen world, with the warmth of the Rin-chan’s palm, it was being melted.
As if in a colorless world had been colored, the world overflowed in color.
Even though I must not think of anything myself, the world that Rin-chan brought me, all of them was so brightly shining.
That warmth from that palm of her that passes through me, it made me think that it was way more warm than the sunlight.
When I noticed it, My world had a sun called Rin-chan, brilliantly shining.
To be able to touch Rin-chan, I started to try perfectly controlling my own strength.
No matter how much constraining livelihood it may be, I just wanted to be beside Rin-chan.
Even if my own life would end up gone, after all she was an important existence more than something like my life.
After I have gotten along with Rin-chan. When I was able to protect Rin-chan from that dog, I felt really happy.
Towards this power that I have only though of despising, for the very first time, I was grateful for it.
And then I vowed.
All of this power, I will use it for Rin-chan.
When I realized that, I finally understood it.
The fact that I was loved by my parents. Even though that disaster had passed, there wasn’t a single moment that my parents had felt hate towards me.
No matter how twisted our relation may be, I was being poured with unconditional love.
And then, I have loved my parents more than anything.
I was finally able to understand that obvious emotion.
There are things that won’t return. But, there will be things that will pile up from now on.
I started to think of my father and mother as important as how much Rin-chan was important to me.
In my world, There was Father, and Mother, and then Rin-chan, only the 3 of them were there.
As long as those 3 are there, no matter what happens, I thought I could stay happy.
batan (collapsing sfx)
There was a sound of something falling down the floor.
Ogre chapter 95 end
9: And so we got Nana’s past from her own perspective. shocking, heartwarming and then shocking. it’s a hamburger